Mercy

I went to the utilities office to pay my water bill. As I parked my car I saw a girl hunched over by a truck. She was looking beneath by the back tires. I wondered what she was doing there, reaching out in a reassuring gesture.

I went down the street and turned around and came back up to park. There I saw the tiny ball of fur on the pavement, she had coaxed the little cat out. She got in the truck as her mother did and they started the engine up. The skittish little cat jumped and bolted...right back toward the truck! I yelped and ran, waving at them as I went. They saw and stopped and waited for me, now my turn to coax her out.

She came to me and my children pretty easily and I gave the ladies the sign to go. Then I left her there in the rain and cold so I could go take care of my bill. While I was inside writing my check to pay a debt, I overheard the ladies talking inside. The little cat was the topic of the conversation. Everyone was talking about it holding on all day, feeling bad for the little stray. But no one wanted it, not one was willing to rescue the creature from the bitter cold and freezing rain.

I paid my debt and walked out with my children in tow. They ran to it, still waiting for us on the sidewalk, crying and scared. She was obviously hungry and weak. Her thick, long hair was dirty and matted and she was soaking wet. There was a stench that emanated from her that was beyond anything soiled I had ever smelled. My stomach rolled and I ordered my boys not to touch her. Lord only knew what she had on her.

We stooped there with her for a moment in the cold, the wet and the wind. Then I said we had to go, "good luck, little friend." As I walked away with my worried children mirroring my own heart, I said a prayer for this sweet little cat, that the Lord would send someone to take her in and nurse her and love her. I got as far as my van as my kids begged for us to be that person. I told them that we can't and then the Lord asked me, "why not?"

I could think of three furry feline good reasons in just an instant that were waiting for me at home! Not to mention my anti-cat husband off flying and not available to say yes or no. But when I looked back down the walk at that furry little mess, my heart broke open and compassion poured out and I knew I couldn't leave her there. I couldn't be like the rest.

I went back and scooped her up and she willingly surrendered to me. Crying and purring and nuzzling against me. I placed her on the seat and closed the door. My kids were buckling up and squealing with delight, all the while I was terrified my husband was going to kill me.

We drove home as our sweet new addition, however temporary, happily cleaned herself and stunk out my van. When we got home I told my boys she had to stay outside. I'd build her a dry bed and hiding place on the porch and give her food and water, but she could not come in without dad's consent.

She spent two days and two nights on our porch. Crying at the door, sleeping in a box and climbing around the furniture. All the while she was capturing our hearts and making the transition into our home much more inevitable.

We finally brought her in-to bathe her. It took forever to get her clean. We shampooed her over and over again to get all of the filth that was matted in her fur broken apart and washed out. The stench that came off of her was grotesque and many times my husband and I both thought we would be sick.

Once we had washed away all that we could from her little body we towel dried her and my husband wrapped her up in his arms and held her close. Then I had to take the shears and start trimming the rest of the clumps and mess away from her that had refused to give in the hot water and shampoo. I had to cut away most of the fur along her backside.

She was red, irritated and on the verge of infection or worse. I saw all of this once I had removed the obstructions that were the guilty culprits to her misery. She cried as we cleared them away, but she never fought us.

Our little girl has never gone back outside since that day three months ago. My husband in all of his grumpiness and resistance has a heart of gold and felt mercy for our new little friend. And so we named her-Mercy.

The other day I woke up early and the house was silent. I crept out to the living room and turned on some worship music and began to pace the room. I just allowed myself to give the Lord praise and to honor Him and thank Him. I heard a familiar cry and opened my eyes.

Mercy was sitting on the couch looking up at me confused. I walked to her, as I prayed, and smiled and began to scratch her neck and pet her back. She nuzzled into me and purred. I thanked Him for bringing her into our lives and what a sweet addition she has been to our home and family. Then in a flash I saw myself in her beautiful, yellow eyes.

I saw the woman I was five years ago. I was wounded, sick from the inside out, scared, running, hungry-starving. I was alone and terrified and untrusting. I was filthy, unwanted and wreaked of filth.

I was that little kitty so close to death one way or another out in the world-lost, alone and helpless. People saw me and felt bad. Some thought about helping, but didn't. I was scurrying here and there, just trying to survive in whatever manner I thought I could.

I knelt down beside my Mercy and cried over His poured out on me. He could have left me there. I was unworthy. I was disgusting. I was no one. I had nothing to offer. I wasn't worth the trouble I would bring. I was rotting. I was pathetic. He didn't see that. Just as He wouldn't allow me to see Mercy that way.

He arranged for me to be in the right place at the right time. He sent that young girl to show patience and kindness to draw me out of my hiding place. He sent someone to see me as I fled and fell and almost died in my grief. He had that person rescue me from beneath the beast that was about to destroy me.

He sent Someone along that had compassion for the weak. He sent Someone to feed the hungry and give shelter to the poor. He sent Someone who wasn't disgusted by the sight of me or afraid to take on whatever challenges may arise for taking responsibility for me. He sent Someone to save me.

He picked me up out of the mud and sheltered me in His warmth against the wind and the rain. He took me home and fed me. He took the time to cleanse me-no matter how long it took, He didn't give up! When some of my ugliness and filth didn't want to come loose or let go of me...He never left me. He never said, "forget it". He saw my need and persevered.

He washed me. He took the time to cut away that which would not easily go under pressure. All the while loving me, reassuring me, comforting me. He held me close to His heart and whispered word of affirmation in my ear.

He exposed my wounds and sickness to the light. But even then He didn't flee or throw me back out. He washed me again, with compassion and mercy and tenderness. He hurt for me. He cried for me. He loved me. Then He fed me and nursed me and as I waited for the other shoe to drop or the eviction notice to come...it never did.

I am still in His home and I am still loved and provided for every single day.

So when did I become a cat? A cat that will only come to show affection on their terms and when they are done with you they leave and go off by themselves. A cat that only calls your attention when they need something from you. A cat that doesn't serve much purpose and doesn't contribute much to the family or the home or the needs of those around it. I have become a fat, lazy cat in the Kingdom of God.

I want to be that kitten again. I want to be full of zeal and excitement and wonder. I want to be ready to jump and play and pay attention to my Master each time He calls. I want to follow Him and watch His every move with curiosity. I want to want to always be near Him, even as I rest...with my head laid gently on His lap or curled up near His head. I want to nuzzle and love on Him and show my appreciation and my love to Him every single day! I need a fresh out-pouring of catnip! A fresh anointing!

Thank you, Lord, for revealing me to me through the eyes of a cat. Thank you for rescuing me and using me to rescue another. Thank you for not leaving me in my mess and for not throwing me back out when I make a mess in your house or steal from you or deprive you of my company. Thank you for unconditional love. Thank you for loving me enough to show me how lazy I can be sometimes and not allowing me to stay there.
Thank you for Mercy, Lord-Yours and mine.




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